The wife and I were sitting around the breakfast table one lazy Sunday morning. I said, “If I were to die suddenly, I want you to immediately sell all my stuff.”

“Now why would you want me to do something like that?” she asked.

“I figure you will eventually remarry, and I don’t want some asshole using my stuff.”

She paused, looked at me, and said, “What makes you think I’d marry another asshole?”